Why is communication not everything?

Hey! What’s up?

So, lately I’ve been giving a lot of thought to effective communication.

See, I took part in some casual online networking event the other day.

I introduced myself as everyone else did in that group, but then … after a few minutes I got a private message on my Facebook: “Would you like to cooperate with me? I love your energy and you’re so convincing!” – I read.

WOW – I wasn’t even looking for a job or a new contract and there were so many other people from my field too. But it was me who was offered a really great deal. Well, “it must be my interpersonal skills and good vibes I’m trying to send to everyone, even subconsciously, wherever I go.” – I thought to myself.

We often hear:  you need to be a great communicator in order to win contracts, get promoted or impact other people. Well, we obviously should be concise, to the point, and confident while expressing our ideas. And I’ll talk about it in other posts and videos later on. But I do know that is insufficient.

So what’s essential to communicate with others?

Above all, we need to understand one important thing first: we need to connect with people.

We should go that extra mile so that people will remember how they feel around us. It’s not about our words as much as about the energy or some kind of heat we conduct and touch people with.

How do we do that?

Here’s a three-step plan I’ve made for you:


1. Work to your strengths.

Ask yourself: Are you better off one-on-one or in large groups?

You don’t need to like crowds and that’s perfectly fine.

You want to connect – do it when you thrive – we all thrive in just some places – is it a video chat, office meeting, the gym, cafe, restaurant, concert, sporting or networking event? You don’t need to be thriving in every social role. Play by your rules. 


2. Prepare for the connection.

Ask yourself: why you want to connect with that particular person or people. Is it just for entertainment or business-related purposes? With that in your mind, you’ll behave and speak accordingly. Apart from that, smile at yourself to give the meeting the right tone and to feel comfortable in your own skin. Yes, connecting does need energy. It can’t be flat, so the better you prepare, the better you and the people around you will feel. I personally don’t even need to do any ritual dancing at this point. I automatically set that mode before I’m about to encounter people in general. And I always smile! But I must admit: I worked on that pretty hard and yes, it took me years to be able to connect with other folks.

3. Find some common ground with your conversationalist.

We simply like people who share the same ideas, passions, and backgrounds. There’s no doubt about that.

I hope this perspective will help you look at your communication more consciously. It certainly helped me.

So to wrap it up:

Don’t forget to go the extra mile and: find the place where you thrive, prepare for the encounter, and find this common ground. 

Well in my case, it does work! Eventually, I “accidentally” won a nice contract.

If you want to join my LC MasterMind groups where we work on our interpersonal skills, you’re welcome to email me at info@agatasway.com

And how do you communicate with others? Do you have your own proven, tested techniques?

I will be grateful for any comments here below the post. 🙂

See you in a bit!

A.

Bonus for non-native English speakers:
Here you’ll find some nice language that is worth paying attention to:

  • to give a lot of thought to something = to think really hard about something
  • to impact other people = to influence other people (mind you – we stress the second syllable in the verb!)
  • insufficient = not enough
  • to go that extra mile = to make that extra effort
  • concise = short, brief
  • to conduct = to transmit; lead
  • to thrive = to prosper, bloom
  • business-related = connected with business (mind you: noun + related = connected with)
  • flat = without any emotions
  • to wrap it up = to sum up
  • an encounter = a meeting

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